Daydream

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“All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds, wake in the day to find that it was vanity; but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act on their dreams with open eyes, to make them possible. This I did.”

– T.E. Lawrence aka Lawrence of Arabia

She walked into my Human Anatomy classroom with red heels as high as my state of mind, dangerous weapons of mass seduction that immediately inspired my perpetual infatuation. She carried on her right shoulder a Louis Vutton purse as big as my ego, and her countenance bore a sparkling pair of eyes as charming as my charisma. It was like The Lord had returned prematurely as a woman, because the light she radiated was undoubtedly divine. And I’d heard through the grapevine, that she only considered herself a nine. Faint attempt at modesty if you ask me because this girl was phenomenally fine. Her lips wore the color of sweet red wine. And all I wanted to do was dine…with her. Ok maybe I lied…more like have her…for dinner. And perhaps also for dessert. Oh the thirst! She was the oasis to my desert! Her hips were like an hour glass pouring infinite golden grains of sand, with enough winding curves to leave even the Prince of Persia wishing he had a genie of his own, like Aladdin, so he could simply wish to be reduced into just one of those tiny grains of sand pouring down inside her. And her thighs? Lawd her thighs! Suffice it to say they’d make many a priest reconsider, and let out long deep sighs. Not to mention her breasts…now they were like luminous lanterns, lighting the way for sore eyes. A counter-intuitive sight, considering that they practically frequently rendered me blind as I eventually found my face planking in them! But not before we were married (of course). For this woman of wonder would not be hurried. Her disposition was rather clear: the only manner of man she would ever seriously entertain was he who would position himself to patiently wait; who would not treat her like some kind of helpless bait…but who would gladly withstand the fire, and yet never tire…of waiting to exhale, at just that precise moment when he’d finally have her approval, after first obtaining her Almighty Father’s approval. Honestly, that narrow path less traveled was preposterously difficult, especially for one who’s already quickly stumbled, along the wide path all too frequently traveled, by way too many sailors, rocking all the wrong fishing boats. I almost called it quits as I was seeming to lose my wits! But then I remembered, nothing worth acquiring is ever easily acquired. For me, that was a very, necessary, epiphany. It’s been more than worth it ever since that defining lesson. Today, I have the pleasure of experiencing Heaven…on Earth in two places – when I kneel with her in church, and when I lie with her in bed, making love faces. After a love life of hopelessly romantic strife, this is the story of how I met my lovely wife. And for the rest of my life…well it would seem, that I will never forget this…daydream.

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A Different Man

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“To be counted among the best, you must be different from the rest.” -kR

He approached her and said, “These other men obviously think you’re pretty but I’m afraid they’re either blind or simply gravely mistaken…”
She looked up at him most contemptuously, as if feeling insulted. But before she could retort in kind he continued, “You’re much more than that…”
Just a moment ago he had her resentment. Now he had her attention.
“Just in case you’re just as mistaken, please allow me to show you what I mean…”
As she sat in her seat perplexed by the range of emotions this strange man had just taken her through in mere moments, he perplexed her even further. Taking a knee before her he removed a mirror from his coat pocket, held it up to her face and said, “Tell me beautiful stranger, what is it you see?”
“Uhm…pieces of me I guess?” She replied timidly. “Your mirror is broken, Sir…I don’t understand.” In response he simply gave a hint of a smile. Tucking the mirror away he said, “Now look me in the eyes and tell me what it is you see.”
At this point she was transfixed to her seat, uncertain about what to think, say or do. Never before had she been approached in such a manner, or by such a manner of man. And she had been approached more times than she even cared to remember, and by more men than she’d ever bother to consider. But to say that this man was different would be an understatement. He then extended his hand toward her as if requesting a formal dance. Taking her left hand in his right he placed a gentle kiss upon it. As he did, he looked into her big, lovely, curious brown eyes and said, “What you saw when you looked into my broken mirror were but fragments of the puzzle that you are; parts of your body and pieces of your heart that reflected the misplaced desires of many a common man, and the many failures of your previous men, respectively…”
By this time her breathing was getting heavy as she had begun to feel the thoughts in her mind accelerate and the heartbeat in her chest palpitate. “What you saw when you looked into my eyes was the future, the whole picture; the full reflection of the wonder of woman I am certain is to become my completion. And I…”
Without thinking she said, “I do!” Realizing her response might have been way too premature and feeling embarrassed for it, she quickly turned her gaze from him and down at her feet. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking.” She was amazed at how such a routine task had suddenly become a near impossible feat for her.
“It’s okay, I was just wondering if you would care to share this dance with me.”
It was only then she realized that she hadn’t even noticed when the soft music had started playing. Regaining her bearings and only appearing to regain her signature composure, she smiled from ear to ear and looked up at him. “How could I possibly say no now?”

P.S. Sometimes, when a woman so easily says yes to a man it is not because she is easy; some men just make it difficult for a woman to say no.

A Secret Name

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You couldn’t spell her name without…ah never mind that cliche, just call her unique. For truly eyes have never before beheld such a mesmerizing physique. And while her physical appearance is naturally endearing, it is her mental prowess that is most positively appealing. What wonder of woman; beyond wonderful actually, the eighth wonder of the world if we’re talking factually. I met her when she was but a caterpillar, and yet I knew this was a creature I’d someday want to make my pillar. The embodiment of language, culture, and diversity, this woman’s portrait would be the envy of the Mona Lisa. It’s a privilege to be counted among her compatriots; honestly a visit with her ought to require a visa. To accurately capture her personality I’d have to commission Da Vinci to create another masterpiece. She could make your heart go to war and still manage to leave your mind at peace. I believe her favorite word is Serendipity. I do wonder, what it would take to have Webster’s Dictionary replace it with __________.

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When Love is Blind

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“True beauty is that which even a blind man can see.” -kR

On the night I lost my eyes I saw the light. In the pitch black darkness of that still night she held my hand, guiding me into the twilight as we prepared for our fateful dance under the pale moonlight. Casting shadows atop a wondrous mountain, the smile on her face I could so easily ascertain. “That’s right,” I told her. I could feel her smile and hear her gaze. My distorted sense of the different senses left her amazed. And she found herself unable to retort. Her mouth agape, pondering how this once agape love had become so erotic. How could a blind man possibly love her? How could he so willingly trust a woman he had never seen? So many questions and so few answers had left many an onlooker just as bewildered. And while this all sounded magical it was no sorcery; just a pure and innocent beauty. A simple and genuine love, a marriage of two souls converging into one heart through a shared body. Our final act was to serve as a reminder to the new hybrid human race that would emerge from the colors of the wind we would paint with our bodies as they brushed each other with different strokes; an alternating pulsating melody of the intertwining of gentle and fierce. Ying and Yang, we went out with a bang! And thence, a new universe was born. A new world would arise devoid of the differences that once burdened the eyes. No more race, color, creed. We had morphed and become one with light, nature, and God Himself. On this brand new day, our children and our children’s children would see each other as they truly were – forever blind with love.

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My Favorite Class

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She was only a stranger until I first laid eyes upon her. Impressed by her course description I decided to enroll. I then quickly moved my way up into her honor roll. And she immediately became my favorite class. I must’ve made a good first impression myself since she named me the class prefect. However, due to our natural geographic incompatibility and my financially limited mobility, I had to settle for a distance education. You know what they say about online classes, I found it so hard to focus! Seeking leverage over competing students I would’ve gladly been the teacher’s pet but this was college. So fancy, she made me trust my intuition over her tuition. Her lessons were quite expensive but worth every penny. I even applied for financial aid just so I could afford her intellectual aid. I took out emotional loans, of which I still owe the balance. I have since dropped out of all my other classes and defaulted on my outstanding loans. I pray my exes find a way to forgive me. But once you find the one for you, you’ve finally found your major. Having already changed it quite a few times, I was convinced I had at last discovered my calling. To think I started out as just a foreign exchange student who quickly became an acquaintance, who eventually became an Associate…but I messed up. I failed her! And then I became a Bachelor for it…for a while…that is, until she gave me a second chance to make amends for my bad romance. Today, I am proud to say I have a Masters in her. Soon enough I’ll be able to give her this PhD! I mean, it’s been about six years, you know! Besides, with my new-found pedigree, we both agree I’ve definitely earned THAT degree! Some tell me that it took me way too long…maybe this is true, but to each his own. It’s not a sprint but a marathon. Moreover, a wise man once told me that what matters most is not the destination but the journey. The bottom line is, I have stood the test of time and passed my final exam. Henceforth, I shall take this class every year until death do me drop out.

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You are Chivalry

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“You cannot afford to let other people’s negative reactions dictate your positive actions.” -kR

I guess you could say I’m old school:  I’ll open doors; they’re not that heavy! I’ll call; I’ve got unlimited minutes! I’ll pay; it ain’t tricking if you got it!

Oh, so you decided to stop being yourself because some myopic woman called you thirsty for being a gentleman? Well, do you know what’s worse than being thirsty? Being an idiot!

Fellas, believe it or not, Chivalry has less to do with the woman than it has to do with you! How do you identify yourself? Don’t stoop to the level of the immature woman who doesn’t appreciate such a longstanding natural gesture, courtesy of a genuine, real man. Keep calm and seek one who does!

Let he who has ears listen. Godspeed!

P.S. Chivalry is not something a man does, but rather something a man is. Therefore, Chivalry can never die as long as unapologetic gentlemen yet live.

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Track Star

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“The woman that I would try is worth every trial that I would face.” -kR

Down in the blocks oblivious to the cheers of the crowd, he has a singular focus – win the race and earn the reward. For truly never before has such a uniquely beautiful medal been at stake. With eyes on the prize he barely notices the hurdles on the track. “Stay in your lane,” he reminds himself to run his own race. As far as he is concerned this race is his for the taking. There is no competition in the seven other lanes, because ultimately his greatest competition is the runner within.

The pistol blasts off and the other runners follow suit! Ah the anxiety of those who pursue the desires of the heart! For his part he runs with graceful strides, relatively slower albeit deliberately so. “Never let your emotions act without the benefit of reason.” By the home stretch the sprinters have grown weary, but having kept a consistent pace he’s still in good shape. As he passes the leading runner who stares at him with mouth agape, he recalls an evening chat he once had with the prize about the fable of the tortoise and the hare. As he remembers the morale of her version he smiles and says to himself, “I just finish what I start.”

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Man and the Same

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“Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.” -Bill Maher

All men are the same? False!
Why? For starters, you shouldn’t try them all.
Although, truth be told you couldn’t possibly try them all.
However, if somehow you did manage to try them all,
Then hopefully you’d realize that it wasn’t all men who were the same but you.

How? Well, you were a constant to these variable men, the same thing to them all.
All these men you tried had the same thing in common – You.
You were the same for repeating the same ill advised practice over and over again,
And yet somehow expecting you would find someone different.

The fact is:
All men are born equal but not all men grow equally.
And just because some men may be similar,
It doesn’t mean that these men are the same.

P.S. “It’s not the men in your life that matters, it’s the life in your men.” -Mae West

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Dear Crush

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Dear Mine,

It is with utmost pleasure that I pick up this pen and spill this ink upon this paper, to grace your eyes with words you shall not soon forget.

For years you’ve had no idea, but for years you’ve been the she…for me, even while you were yet with he…and I was yet with another she. God must have let that be…so that there could be a better we, eventually…inevitably, according to the plans He has for we. Unsuspectingly, all along you were the she…for me. Finally, I am ready to see you become that she…for me. So please tell me, what’s it going to be?

Sincerely,

Yours

The Circle of Life

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“The difference between a man and a boy is analogous to that between a lion and a cub. One’s king, while the other plays around like he’s king.” -kR

These days I see but a jungle full of cubs posing for lions. Too many Simbas, not enough Mufasas! Oh so you just can’t wait to be king, and yet you couldn’t get your so called queen a wedding ring. First you sniffed her all around, getting her all aroused. Then you played around her, then you played around with her, then you played with her, and then ultimately you played her. Your roar was so fake, for you swore she was your only cake. But then she caught you eating quite a number of other cupcakes. And now you come crawling back to me talking about how the stakes…are so high, and you just have to have her back. Fool, you’d still have her if only you’d never turned your back on her, but had continued to have her back instead of cheating behind her back. It was your pride that was your undoing. Now you are a victim of your own wrongdoing. No son, it’s not that life is unfair, it’s just the circle of life! What goes around comes around…and now you’ve crash landed into the ground – a wounded lion. Now tell me, what hurts more – is it your heart or your pride? That’s important for you to decide. For you see, if it’s the former, then there’s hope for you yet; because while hearts may bend they can still mend if you would make amends. But if it’s the latter, then understand that no amount of flatter will help you resolve this matter. I’m afraid my own pride will not let me welcome you back into the Pride. For a lion to claim a queen he must first become a king. Until you learn that lesson my little cub, you deserve no more than those thirsty little hyenas. Remember:  In the jungle, you only reap what you sow! Now at last my dear son, now at least…you know!

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